Tag Archives: naturist

The Uncovered Policeman: Caribbean Blues

The Uncovered Policeman: Caribbean Blues

Hot onto the presses the latest instalment in my Rags to Riches series the Uncovered Policeman: Caribbean Blues!

Uncovered Policeman Caribbean Blues
Uncovered Policeman Caribbean Blues

“Hot on the presses”? You mean “off the presses”!

No I mean “on” … publication is February 14th so it is not off yet!  But you can pre order now!

Here are the fist few page to whet your appetite!!

Caribbean Blues, Chapter 1

The knock on the door was a surprise. Visitors turning up unannounced were a rarity at L’Abeille Nue. Most of the local people knew to call in advance. Fewer people called after dark, in early November.

After a quick exchange of glances and gestures, Rags was nominated to answer the door. He pulled on a dressing gown as he closed the door on the lounge where Bea and the children were watching TV in front of the log fire.

He unlatched the door and froze. He did a double take. If Bea was in front of the TV in the lounge, who was here looking back at him, illuminated by porch lights and the light streaming through the doorway?

The person standing in front of him would certainly pass the mother of his children. In fact, the young lady was a dead ringer for the Bea he had first met nearly ten years earlier.

“Hi, Mr. Adiscombe?” The voice was not Bea’s. She had a strange version of an American accent. “I am Elodie, I suppose I am to be your niece, no, your cousin.” The grammar was if anything French. In the light of the doorway, Rags thought he could see her brown eyes dancing at his confusion.

Yes, Rags was confused. For a start, it had been years since anybody, apart from the bank manager, had called him Mr. Adiscombe. He had been Seaman Adiscombe in the navy. PC Adiscombe in the police force. Addy to his mates in both. His mother had just switched from calling him Sabbath to calling him by the name Bea had given him years ago. She had decided to name him, indirectly, after the rabbit in ‘Rag, Tag and Cotton Tail’. The rabbit in the BBC Children’s programme was Cotton Tail, and, at the time, so was Rags.

“If you are my cousin, best you come in and meet your other cousin, or may be your sister.” Now Elodie looked surprised. “Wait until you meet her!” Rags responded to her confusion. “Shall I take your coat? Your backpack? Anything else?”

Rags lead Elodie across the hallway, opened the door to the lounge. Bea looked up “Who was at the door?”

Rags ushered Elodie into the room, “Our cousin, Elodie”

The two women looked at each other. Elodie suddenly understood why Rags had accepted her claim to be family so easily. The naked woman looking up at her from the floor looked like her reflection. Bea saw herself, a dozen years younger, standing next to the man she loved. There was a pause.

“I’ve never met my Uncle Dave, is he well?”

“Dad is good. He told me a lot about my European family. He said he hoped I would have a chance to meet with some of you. Then he phoned last week and told me where to come to find you. He wants to speak to you both urgently.”

 

Read more, just click on the pic!

Uncovered Policeman Caribbean Blues
Uncovered Policeman Caribbean Blues

Free Short Story Weekend

Free Short Story weekend (Jan 14 -15, 2016)

This weekend you can read some examples of my writing for free.

Yes you read it right …. This weekend all four of the Rags to Riches short stories are available to download and keep for absolutely nothing, zip, nahda, bugger all, that is to say FREE.

As Leo Sayer sang back in the 1970’s I’m “Giving It All Away” … Because it is a big thing to do to invest in a book by a writer you have heard of and a book in a genre you have never tried.

  • What if I hate it as a result of the way it is written?
  • Maybe I’ll not be able to understand the subject?
  • Supposing I am embarrassed or offended by the content?

It is just a case of following these links to Amazon .co.uk to buy, read and keep or throw away at no risk, for nothing, for Free.

 

Free Weekend The Girls Trip to the Beach
The Girls Trip to the Beach

It is the weekend, Bea on a language course in France, she and a new friend take a trip to the beach. In addition it is a naturist beach.

Free Weekend cocoa-and-pyjamas-cover
Cocoa and Pyjamas short story

Invited to dinner and to stay over … what happens when the evening finishes with cocoa, dressed ready for bed … since you don’t own any pajamas?

 

Free Weekend Naked Warriors Cover
The Naked Warriors,
A Rags to Riches short story

A tale about a war damaged army officer and the a junior officer, a woman, who saved his life.

The Cutter's Tale - Free Weekend
The Cutter’s Tale

The prequel to the Uncovered Policeman, how does a normal couple from middle-England come to manage a naturist resort?

This Weekend …

Firstly 0rder one book or order all four. After all the price is the same this weekend absolutely nothing! All four books are Free.

Then (I hope) enjoy reading these stories, because

Next weekend …

Most of all, I’d love you to read the novellas and novels in the Rags to Riches series.  They are available as Kindle downloads and also as real paperback books!

The Uncovered Policeman Goodbye Blues

After careful proofing, reading revising and generally being looked at  …  The Uncovered Policeman Goodbye Blues is now for sale! In two format,s as a Kindle e-book and as a real paperback book  (remember real books?).

Both are available on Amazon now!

The Uncovered Policeman: Goodbye Blues
The Uncovered Policeman: Goodbye Blues

Goodbye Blues

As the fourth Rags to Riches series book featuring Rags and his life partner Bea begins we find:

PC Adiscombe is off work with a bad back (again).
His girlfriend, newly qualified solicitor Bea Johnston, is about to start a new job in France.
PC Adiscombe hopes that at least he will be able to spend a few weeks in France with her.
Then things go right, very right.
Old friends rally around and assist in many different ways. Family offers help and they are on the way …
On the way where? Why? Will they be successful?
What is the future for PC Adiscombe’s alter ego Rags the naturist?
What is the difference between the naturist Bea and the Naked Bee?

And there is more, much more!

Read it for yourself and you will find out what happens next in the lives of Rags and Bea.  You will enjoy all the usual fun, romance and laughter in the sunshine as Bea and Rags new adventure starts from a low point in their time together. Will the sun shine on their new venture as they move forward to a new future naked together  …

This is the longest of the Rags to Riches series books published to date, nearly twice the length of the original The Uncovered Policeman book. More to read for the same money!

After you have read the story please write a review of the book on Amazon so others know what they are getting into!

This story follows on from

  • The Uncovered Policeman
  • The Uncovered Policeman Abroad
  • The Uncovered Policeman  – In and Out of The Blues

Looking forward to Winter

“Looking forward to winter” … That’s a very strange thing for a naturist to write you might think.

 

 

The Uncovered Policeman: In and Out of the Blues
The Uncovered Policeman: In and Out of the Blues

 

The Uncovered Policeman
The Uncovered Policeman

 

The Uncovered Policeman Abroad
The Uncovered Policeman Abroad

Actually I am already looking forward to the coming summer; the sun, the warmth, the long evenings … Now that is the catch in this modern day and age.

I write on my lap top.

Lets face it copy typing a long hand manuscript is never going to be my forte. The “Typex” (a special white paint that you used to hide mistakes on typewritten pages) bill would be astronomical.  I would still have to scan the pages to digitise the output.  So I write on my laptop.

When I say write …. I am talking about transferring the silly ideas from my head to an electronic page via the first finger of each hand. Back to the lap top.

The problem with a laptop in summer is I want to be outside in the sun. Outside in the sun is where I get some of my less silly ideas. Sadly because of the bright light I can’t recognise mistakes as I make them on the computer screen. So the arrival of the earlier sunsets of November through to March means I can start transcribing brain waves to a PDF.

The Uncovered Policeman: Goodbye Blues
The Uncovered Policeman: Goodbye Blues

I might just get the next Uncovered Policeman story finished by Christmas , then there is another couple of half formulated short stories and vague thoughts for a sixth Rags and Bea adventure.

The Cookery Book … I am the genuine Naked Cook, ask anyone who ate at the Quinta da Horta 2011-13 if I am any good

The Project Management Text Book

and …..

Thank goodness for the longer evenings!

Cocoa and Pyjamas

cocoa-and-pyjamas-cover
Cocoa and Pyjamas, a short story for 99p

Cocoa and Pyjamas – A Short Story part of the Rags to Riches series.

Cocoa and Pyjamas has escaped. The story started life in one of those conversations …

“a naturists nightmare … a dream in which you are going to work and everyone is pointing at you, you look down and you are wearing clothes!”

“Nah! A naturist nightmare is waking up and finding you are wearing pyjamas.”

“No a naturist nightmare is drinking cocoa in your pyjamas before going to sleep!”

“That is the plot for a story.”

“No it isn’t it is a nightmare.”

“It’s a plot and I’m claiming it”

“Ok do it”

PZ Walker gets the last line again, but I got the story.

Short but positive and I thought mildly humourous story. good fun and no sex, the only body parts named hands, feet, legs, arms and waist (I think)

Recent Reads

A mixed bag of books read the past few weeks, some good some not so good.

Worth the Wait (St James Book 1) by Jamie Beck

If you can’t guess the ending by page 5 ….. So why the “12 Years Earlier” section … sorry I lost the will to look at the next page at that point.

Two Girls on a Mission by Steven W Johnson

Silliness of the endearing kind. If you want to read something with no weight, no social commentary and no long term impact on anything …. This is the book for you.

Sublight by V G James

Lets take a nerdy ham radio fan (and his mates) add some naked aliens, a few nudists, the US Air force, a Senator and the President of the USA and shake it all up together and you get another enjoyable romp in which everything ends up for the best … unless you are the one alien who gets sick. Yeah Fun!

The Travelling Companion by Ian Rankin

A short story from the creator of Rebus, a very different book from the detective stories.  A case of take a pinch of Dorian Grey mix in a generous helping of Jekyll & Hyde with elements of Don’t Look Now. A compelling story set in Paris … worth reading

The Thirty Nine Steps by John Buchan

A classic … very different from the black and white film … The first book in the Complete Novels of John Buchan (down loaded for just 49pence!!) Brilliant story well told. I will be reading the rest of the collection over the next few weeks.

The Kings Traitor (The Kingfountain Series Book 3) by Jeff Wheeler

I rather like the easy escapist writing of much of Jeff Wheelers writing. I have worked through the Muir Wood stories before moving on the Kingfountain so I guess that is apparent to you. While they are aimed at the teenage reader these stories present interesting and twisted plots of murder mystery and magic. I will continue to read these books as they appear.

Now a real book!

A real book!

The Uncovered Policeman – Rags to Riches Book 1 is now a real book!

A Real book
Uncovered Policeman book jacket

At last  I have reached the point where The Uncovered Policeman is now ‘clean’ enough to be committed to paper for ever. If you read the previous posting about proof reading you will now know where I was coming from.

Creating The Real Book from an e-book

 

Well once this is ink on paper there was no way to change any of the spelling, punctuation or add missing words. Fortunately Mrs Bun has managed to make the time to do the proofing and find about 200 changes that needed to be made.

Then the text had to copied into the template for the size of the book (5 x 8 inches). The auto set up tool tells you it is an ‘unexpected size’ for the proposed publication size 5 x 8 inches. I tried other sizes that didn’t help, but in the end it was accepted.

Then there was the cover … it had to have the print on the spine with a margin for the fold. Which meant that the whole thing depended on the number of pages bound in the book plus the two margins. Sounds simple enough but there were fewer pages than the estimated number, so the cover, which was a .pdf file, had to be changed.

I could have gone for a generic cover or paid “from £300” for a professional design, or is that from 200 copies?

The joys of self publishing for small volume sales .

In the future other books in the Rags to Riches series:

  • Undercover Policeman: Abroad
  • Uncovered Policeman; In and Out of the Blues
  • Uncovered Policeman: Goodbye Blues (due out in October)

will be coming out as paper backs provided  there is some interest in this one!

Currently the Uncovered Policeman is only on ‘createspace,’ and on Amazon.

The Amazon link http://amzn.to/2bRlOIb

Or if you are in North America you can use the createspace link https://www.createspace.com/6550919

 

The case for proof reading?

Proof reading is an attempt to over come the  Pareto principle  that is the “law” that says 80% of your errors will get picked up by your word processor but 20% wont. It also means that while 80% of the changes are correct 20% are actually new errors.

Confused? I am ! So on to the practicalities of why proof read and why it might not be a good idea.

It is interesting to read some of the comments turning up on the Amazon Reviews of my stories. Quite a few refer to the need for proof reading. I accept that my spelling is appalling and my finger (yes a one-digit typist) is often over taken by my imagination and words get missed.

The story that used to attract the most comments
The story that used to attract the most comments

Now here is the rub, if Word fails to point out a mistake, how am I supposed to spot that I have made one?

This is a comment from a review, it is of another authors work but the same person review one of my books.

“I have read many hundreds of books (fiction and non-fiction and mostly not erotic) and the vast majority of them were grammar and punctuation perfect. So I think it’s a pity that erotic book authors don’t take more care because I believe it must have an adverse effect on their sales.”

This is where we, in my opinion – feel free to decry me, hit the big problem.

As far as I am aware none of the authors of naturist fiction (#naturistfiction) are actually making a living out of their naturist fiction. It is a part-time endeavour even a hobby. I think most of us write for our own enjoyment initially then decide to share it. Something that has become possible via Amazon’s KDP, Goodreads and Smashwords.

So, to proof reading. looking for mistakes in an existing piece of writing has to be done by a new set of eyes. Remember Pareto is watching you 20% of your corrections will be extra errors! It takes a lot of effort to carefully read ,, word by word,line by line looking for mistakes rather than enjoying the story. I am lucky I had a volunteer for the Uncovered Policeman Abroad and my wife is a “finisher-completer” and had the time to do the Uncovered Policeman; In and Out of the Blues. Otherwise you pay a specialist. This is great if you have a publisher. They will deduct the cost of proofing, editing or buying you a cup of coffee while arguing about artistic integrity of a phrase, out of your advance on the copies they expect you to sell.

Well, I am planning a party to which you are all invited when the first of my stories sells its 500th unit. (Bring your own bottle, I’ll provide the pork scratchings.) If I had paid for proof reading by a professional I would not be able to afford the pork scratchings until I had sold 700 books and what sort of party would that be? Hey we are having a really big party, after all you are only 47 years old once … nope it doesn’t work.

“OK Ted, do you have a solution?” You ask.

Well, sort of. Most of the #naturistfiction authors (I’m a story teller not an author by the way) seem to be approachable. It is rare not to find an e-mail address in the blurb around the story. Review the story, the writing style and how you felt about the reading experience. Then if you have found specific errors send the writer a nice e-mail pointing out the errors. I am sure most will change the manuscript to correct these mistakes. One of the big joys of these electronic publications is that they can be changed almost daily unlike a printed book.

One word of warning never, never try to correct a plot line! You may discuss why the author chose that path but don’t correct the plot if you want to live long enough to come to the 500th Book Party.

A good week for naturist fiction

What a good week for naturist fiction!

It has been a good week for new naturist fiction again. Having read new books by John David Harding and Wallace Greensage last week … I have read 3 new works of #naturistfiction this week.

First as promised last posting ..

Will Forest, Aglow.

A great piece of writing spoilt, just a little, for the non-Spanish reader by chunks of text in Spanish. Most are translated or pretty obvious in meaning, but having to decide whether to read or to skip over them was inconvenient. on the other hand the story was well written with a strong plot and narrative to keep you engaged. One to read and take a little time over.

D H Jonathan, The Volunteer

A good enough read to keep one entertained for a couple of days by the pool. Dani makes a mistake and plagiarises a paper, gets caught and either faces expulsion from college (USA) or takes part in a social science project that involves being naked 24/7 for 8 weeks. A little light depth about the social encounters it turns into a frothy lightweight romp.. Not that is of itself bad (says the author of lightweight romps – not even I call the Uncovered Policeman ‘literature’). I gave it a 4 star review.

Matthew Black, Screw Firmly From the Rear

The fourth book in a series about Brad and Leanne’s involvement with the Hidden Lake Naturist Resort. It features as ever Brad’s batty mother, Gwen, and his lustful father, George. Things are not good at Hidden Lakes and get worse with the help of the appearance of Brad’s rather attractive ex-colleague from the planning department. Who reveals something Brad has been keeping quiet. Unlike Leanne who is very vocal about another ‘something’ Brad would rather was kept quiet about.

If, unlike Brad, you can cope with George’s smutty tales of his exploits in the far east while in the navy, an entertaining read.

It had me humming the Eagles song Last Resort.

 

New Naturist Fiction

This August there has been a flurry of new naturist fiction publications.

Wallace Greensage set his second New Albion story free. The Naked Truth Will Set You Free is a continuation of the story started in his “Who Is This Naked Lady – And What Have They Done With My Wife?” A Really good read it is too.

John David Harding, has produced a very interesting follow up to the Bare Necessities.

Bare Necessities 2.
A very engaging read, well worth reading.

Will Forest released Aglow his second #naturistfiction story, which is next on my reading list

I hear that P Z Walker has Mirror Earth 2 finished and undergoing editing, so that should be with us soon too. Meanwhile I am slowly moving forward with Uncovered Policeman 4.